Hope everyone has a happy New Year out there wherever you are.
Muni got free rides starting at 8pm to 6am tommorow morning so if you are gonna get sloshed catching the bus is an option.
Hope to get some pics for some new posts before I move divisions and run different buses around Mid January. More on that later. Here’s an idea of where I’m going to be going.
I thought for sure I would be able to get a month in without having people arguing over nothing. I thought wrong.
As I’m on Harrison St. I pull up to 8th and unload some passengers and I see these 2 girls at the corner and I see them debating if they are gonna get on the bus. I’m at the light waiting so they decide and walk to the door and hop on. One got a kid in the stroller and as she gets on she says
“you’re the first bus to stop for us.”
So I tell her “oh” and then let her know that she gotta take the baby out the stroller and her and her friend walk by. Her friend repeats it to her and I close the door and take off. All I’m thinking about is getting to the relief point not too late because I’m already down like 4 minutes due to SFFD had blocked O’Farrell *right* when I made the left turn.
Anyways, I get about a quarter of the block when I hear this one passenger in the front say
“some people just hop on the bus without paying .”
Aw shit breh your mouth just wrote a check that your ass aint gonna be able to cash.
“I don’t think you need to be talking bout me and I think you need to mind your business.”
“I’m not talking to you. I’m just talking out loud. “
Well, you need to keep your comments to yourself.” Girl 1 then tells girl 2 “this dude trippin on us. I got a transfer. Gettin up in my business.”
“I can say anything I want! This is America. I got the freedom to speak anytime!”
“oh yeah you just need to shut the fuck up!”
“You shut the Fuck up!”
At this time, Girl 1 then starts Insulting the guy by making fun of his speech impediment and starts making noises at him. Now this is when another passenger gets into their argument.
“That’s low. That’s real nice to make fun of someone who is disabled. “
The girls pay no attention to him.
(making noises) “you shut the fuck up! I can’t even understand what he’s saying..speak up!
“you shut the fuck up you stupid crack hoe!”
I’m thinking to myself, this is about to get real.
“crack hoe!?! Who do you think I am you retarded fuck? You don’t know me.. Ima whip your ass. Ima get my boyfriend to whip your ass.”
This is when another passenger got in the mix on the girl’s side.
“hey you don’t need to call her that.”
Another one says “We are getting involved in something that doesn’t have to do with us.”
Other passenger in the mix says “that’s true.”
By this time, I’m turning onto 11th and Harrison St and I open the door and the passenger arguing with the girls comes up to the front, pulls put his phone and tells me
“you Need to stay here till the police come because I’m reporting these 2 girls.”
I looked at him and just waited and he pulls his phone out and starts calling a number. The two girls get up and start yelling at dude to move because they want to get off now. After the 2 girls get off(mind you they are still talking shit outside the bus) the passenger guy turns to me and says
“Bus driver thank you and have a nice day” and gets off the bus.
So I closed my doors and pulled out the bus stop and kept going. All I hear other passengers talking about he should have kept his mouth shut and the girls shouldn’t have said anything and I can think of why things always happen when your trying to make your relief off the bus. A lot can happen in 3 blocks.
9 San Bruno Limited. Inbound.
I got no words for this. Sheesh. Some people just…I dunno… what the fuck…
So I’m coming inbound and I get to 24th and Potrero and I see hella people and this dude in a wheelchair waiting. I think to myself “lemme get a good spot to open the ramp so he can get on.” I pull up and open the lift the dude in the wheelchair starts to get on but he is coming on WAYYY to fast and he hits the edge of the ramp and gets stuck. But he still doesn’t let off the gas! He is still trying to get on and I’m telling him “dude you’re gonna have to get back off and come on slow.” He tries again and he his foot gets stuck as he is coming on so he backs off. By this time another driver came up and was trying to also tell dude that he had to change the direction he was aiming for to get on. So dude in the wheelchair tries *again* and this time he comes on so fast he almost flies off the side but gets stuck in the same location as before but now his left wheel is hanging in the air. So the other driver is trying to tell dude to back up and maneuver it one way while im telling him that when he comes on he has to slow down or he is gonna get stuck again. So he straightens out and throttles up the ran HELLA fast and bam hits the bottom of the chair on the inside of the bus before he turned. Now it has turned into a game with this dude. It’s like we are playing a puzzle game and I gotta help this dude get his chair, the puzzle piece, in the bus. He keeps banging the lower part of his chair on the inside of the bus and im telling him he needs to go left, then go right, then slow down and backup and it’s just like this dude don’t understand what im saying and all he knows is go forward fast. He finally turns to me and says “I have to go fast because my battery is dead.” The thing he don’t remember is that I was on another bus getting to pick *this* bus and I saw him on that bus and he had enough time to charge his bus with the charger he HAS IN HIS BACKPACK.
So he finally manages to roll himself into the wheelchair area and I ask him where he is gonna get off and he tells me “7th and Market.”
GREAT.
Now for those that don’t know, in San Francisco, on Market all the island bus stops are not accessible to wheelchairs. It says on the sign but we as bus drivers realize that people in chairs are like anyone else so if we see them we will load them up by pulling up into the intersection or by pulling to the curb vs the island stop.7th and Market is an island stop so in my mind in thinking ” ill get to the curb and dump dude there because this dude is tripping and he may just roll off the bus”
So we rolling and as im coming up to 7th I see I got a 71 right behind me and the bus stop area where i was going to drop him off is blocked off because the farmers market is going on across the street and there are trucks everywhere. So I just pull up past the island into the intersection and start lowering the ramp.
FUCK ITS STEEP.
So dude rolls up to the front and he’s banging shit as he’s coming up so I tell dude “roll slow since we in the street” and dude just shrugged that shit off and starts to roll off. Now im looking at the angle he is going and im thinking ‘fuck this, this dude gonna roll off the side of the bus and Ima catch some heat from this when the ambulance comes so Ima hold on to the chair while he goes down’ and low and behold and I step to grab the chair he starts to edge off the ramp! So im yelling at dude that he’s rolling too fast and that he gonna fall of the ramp while im grabbing on to the wheelchair while he still is trying throttle hella fast. So it totally looks like im pulling him and he trying to get away from me. I dunno how I manage to keep that chair on the ramp and he somehow straightens it out and he rolls off to the street. As he in the street, he starts yelling at me saying “man fuck these buses. these ramps are gonna get me killed. fuck muni” and he rolls across the street on a red light.
I just turn around and start laughing, hop back in the seat, load the ramp back up, close my doors and take off.
Hey folks, nothing story worthy until today so gonna drop this first:
All your awesome /asshole unsavory drivers that you have seen over the last 9 months are gonna change on Saturday October 15th. It’s an in house signup so drivers won’t be switching divisions on this one. Supposedly the operators at Flynn wont be changing runs though. Dunno why not.
I signed Wednesday… AND this time I did something I never thought i would be doing: i signed on a run instead of the usual extra board I was going with(ill explain those in a post in a few weeks). Hope it doesn’t bite me in the ass later.
Good thing I didn’t pick this hold down again. Not a bad run but damn theirs too many crazies downtown. I need a change of scenery for a bit.
So I get to 5th and Market on time, which is weird for a Friday downtown. I’m pretty glad that im going to be getting of this run and going to be on evening/late niter next week so im thinking to my self ’20 more minutes till im off’ and i pull up to the stop, open the doors and start to load up the people.
As I opened the doors, scanned the crowd and noticed crazy dude from 10 days ago and im thinking to myself, “maybe today he is not going to be talking to himself…”
So wrong…so wrong…
As he steps on he said something along the lines of “I don’t need anyone” or ” I don’t care for anyone”. So this time around, I pulled out my pen and paper and wrote down almost every phrase he said.
He went to stand around the backdoor and the performance began:
“I’m no good for anybody” said multiple times
“I don’t care” said multiple times
“It’s all in my head”
“I’m not afraid to be locked up”
“Theirs a radio in my head”
“I’m a schizophrenic” said like 4 times
“Stevie Wonder has money”
“I don’t need a newspaper. I got a newspaper in my head”
“I can see my own tv in my head”
Then some people were talking about the giants and how they were playing and what time the game started and then Mr. Crazy felt like making some statements on that:
“no no no no no no” repeated 2 times
“I hate the Giants” said 3 times
“To hell with the Giants”
“I don’t care about the Giants” said 2 times
“I live in my own universe”
“I don’t know if I reading a book or not”( He had no book)
So I got to Division and Bryant and I picked up this other driver and he asked me how my day was and I told him to listen and Mr. Crazy was back to saying “I don’t care” several times. He asked me some other questions which helped me keep my mind off dude. I got to 17th and dropped off the driver and I continued on. Mr. Crazy said “I’m no good to nobody” a couple more times and I got to the relief at 24th and seen that it was not the regular driver and I told him the condition of the bus and that he had a crazy dude on the bus talking to himself. He just shrugged it off and smiled and started to adjust the seat and I took off.
Also, I knew I had seen someone who looked like this dude online and I found the image. He looks almost dead on like this guy with the glasses (minus the fitted hat) on the left side in the picture. Now you know who to keep away from on Market.
Heres the 2nd event of 5th:
So I get back to 5th and market. Same location as earlier. This was my relief trip so I wanted to get off on time but with all the construction on Bush and Jones, by the time I got to 5th I was already down 4 minutes and on the 27, those 4 minutes are hard…very hard to get back.
So as I open the doors to start loading up people the 4th or 5th person on the bus is this tall black dude with an orange polo shirt, khaki pants and dark frame glasses. First thing he says is:
“tomorrow night I’m going to be in the mission”
And he walks back and repeats it 4 more times. I’m thinking to myself ‘ ehh maybe dude just high or something’ and take off. Well, we get down a couple blocks and he says it again hella loud another 5 times. Now I’m starting to think ‘ya this dude not all there.’
So we get to 5th and Harrison and all of a sudden I hear him say “no one loves me” a couple of times and then BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM! and I’m thinking I either ran something over or somebody is on the outside trying to get in. So on the 3rd BAM I look back into the bus and see this dude pounding on the window and as I’m about to say something he stops and points to something out the window.
AINT NOTHING OUT THE WINDOW
So some lady starts talking to him; asking him if he’s alright and asking him some other questions and he doesn’t respond to her questions so she leaves him alone. I get down to 11th and Harrison and he starts up again. This time he says “I’m stupid, no one loves me” and he says it 4 more times and he gets louder. Now at this time this *other* lady I guess saw that she was going to correct dudes thoughts about life. So she gets all next to dude and starts having the conversation where she was saying you’re not stupid and how people he knows are the ones filling his mind with all this junk and how he shouldn’t believe anything negative. So she got this speech/therapy session going and i pull up to 16th and Bryant and start loading up people. I think hear her getting all louder and she comes up to the front still yelling ” don’t think like that. oh thank you bus driver this is my stop” and gets off the bus. Damn she basically hyped up dude with her speech and got off hahah. So im hoping dude don’t loose it between the next 8 blocks because I want to get off and go home.
We get down a couple more blocks and im sure he said something else along the lines like “I want to die” or “I want to cry,” and im thinking to myself lemme make it, lemme make it. So I get to 24th and pop the brake, put it in neutral and grab my stuff. I see my relief and tell him how the route is looking and tell him that there is some dude on the bus talking to himself. He goes “when isn’t there one?” and we both start laughing and I take off walking. I look in to the side of the bus and see crazy dude reading a book or some papers. Maybe dude was reading a script? nah dude is crazy.
It’s funny to me when people try to scam the system. I’m just saying if you get caught,just man up and pay the fare and keep it moving. Anyways this is story 1 of 2 today.
So I get to 5th and Market and start loading up my people. As I’m handing out transfers and talking with people, I’m surveying the crowd and notice this one dude I picked up last week who had no money and gave me a story to why he didn’t have it. He’s a Goofy looking dude with his Hawaiian shirt and some shorts and a black bag with some stuff in it. So I see him today and well…he’s gonna pay since he rode free last time. He is the last one to get on so I already get that “feeling” that he is gonna ask for another free ride.
NOPE. NOT GONNA HAPPEN.
So he gets on and the convo goes like this:
Him-”hey bus driver can I get a ride?”
Me-”where you trying to go?”
Him-”I’m going to pick up my check. “
Now mind you, this is the *EXACT* same thing that happened last Friday, so I KNOW he doesn’t remember me for squat. So on friday I told him to have the correct fare next time and let him ride. TODAY, it went different.
Me-”you told me that already. You gonna have to put something in the box”
Him- (starts putting in change) ” I need a transfer. “
Me-(looks at the farebox and it says 40¢) “you can ride but you ain’t gettin a transfer on 40 cents.”
Him-(pulls out what looks like 14 cents more and holds it in his hand)” but I gave you everything.”
Me-”well you might as well sit down because you ain’t getting a transfer. “
So he walks back and takes a seat. So by the time he sits down were already at Harrison and 5th where I’ma turn and load/unload some people. I can hear him fidgeting around with his bag so I’m like whatever. I go 2 more stops(7th) and as I’m closing my door after loading up someone, he comes back up to the front and goes:
Him-”so if u give you the rest of my change, can I get a transfer? I need a transfer. “
Me- “it better be 35 cents if you want that transfer. “
So take a quick peek over my shoulder and he goes back and sits down. I get to 8th and open the door because someone wants to get off and he’s the first one out the door.
Just another SMH moment.
These crazies come in all forms with the weirdest shit.
So I’m pulling up to 5th and Market and I start loading up my passengers and this old dude gets on my bus last and I already had a feeling he was gonna set himself apart from everyone else. He looked like the beat up, overweight, bushy eyebrow TL version of Carl Reiner
him-”i need to go to st Francis.”
me-”the hospital?”
him-”ya. do you know where i got to get off?”
me-” ya. bush st”
him-”and?”
me-”levenworth.”
him-” ok. um (starts fumbling with his wallet to show me his L pass) um im gonna sit behind you.”
him-”ok. hello”
So I take off from the stop. He first throws out a comment to lady with her kid by calling her a muchacha Bonita and then he directed a comment to me.
Him-”hey bus driver you gonna tell me where to get off right?”
Me-”ya “
All of a sudden dude starts having a conversation.
With. His. Bandage.
Yes folks you read that right. He was having a convo with his bandage on the bus on his way to the hospital. It was interesting to say the least.
“oh no. No no no. Don’t you come off. (pause) you better stay on there. We got places to go and you better not come off. I don’t want to have to turn you over. “
“oh hey is glideeeeeee”
“you need to stay stuck on there. That’s why were going to the hospital. Don’t do nothing silly. “
He said more but i cant remember the other phrases he was using. His tone of voice was hilarious too because he was acting like a parent; scolding the bandage with a firm voice to make sure he was in charge.
Then when I would be going over bumps/potholes:
“ow. Ow. I got this pain. That’s why I’m going to the hospital. “
He kept going on with this for a good couple minutes and you know I was trying to get him to the hospital as fast as I could before I would start laughing.
So I pull up to Bush and he is *still* talking to his bandage and I yell “this is the hospital” and he gets up hella quick, comes next to me and says “where is it at?” and I point down the block to my left and he steps off. As he is getting off I can hear him talking to himself saying “I’m going to the hospital, I’m going to the hospital.. Come let’s go. “
I just start laughing and pull off from the light when it changes green.
Some people should be clowns or jesters and because they only pop up for comic relief hahaha
As I was driving up on Oakdale approaching Bayshore, I had this one guy come up to the front of the bus and basically proceed to talk my ear off.
Him-”you hear anything about the stabbing on the 14?”
Me-”I ain’t seen the article but I heard they figured out the weapon that was used was a screwdriver. “
Him-”oh yeah. Me and my lady were on the 14 yesterday and this white lady said she had a knife and was gonna cut someone.”
Me-”yeah. They said it was a screwdriver. “
Him-”ya but this lady said she had a knife and was gonna kill someone because she didn’t care. She kept telling my lady that.”
At this point I knew he was not gonna stop talking so after all his responses all I did was nod and say Uh-huh.
-”ya that lady kept tellin my lady that and homie she said she was gonna do it.”
-”I hope they got that lady cuz I ride with my kid you know what I’m saying”
-”she was making threats to my lady and I don’t play like that homie.”
-”that 14 line is crazy homie. You know they got a lot of crazy people on that line you know what I’m saying.”
-”in Los Angeles where I live, if the bus seats are full the bus is full. I came out here and seen that you could stand up and until everyone is packed in it’s full homie. That was like a culture shock homie you know what I’m saying”
-”my cousin is snoop dogg and I’m in the music industry but you know out here they got that red and blue stuff and I don’t play like that homie. I’m cool with everyone. You know mr Capone-e? He my cousin. But you know homie I’m coo with everyone.”
-”I ain’t got time for this red or blue stuff. I’m a sous chef and I make 80,000 a year homie you know what I’m saying”
-”you know I’ma little drunk but I’m coo homie, I keep to myself I don’t go crazy on people like that lady with the knife.”
-”ya know it’s crazy on these buses homie. Ya know when I be drinking I be Gettin on the bus but I don’t bang none of these colors out here but ya know homie people assume. Like if I were to shave my head ya know what I’m saying”
-”you from frisco homie? You look like you from here. “
-”you know homie I’m from San Diego and it’s a big difference to San Francisco homie.”
So the last thing this dude says before getting off on Misson st is:
-”You know what those dudes did to that giants fan? That ain’t right homie. That ain’t right. But I’ll tell you if they catch those dudes I’ll be the first one in line to cut off their heads you know what I’m saying”
I open my doors and he tells me to have a good day and he walks away.
All I can do is shake my head, close the doors and drive away.
Had the 9 San Bruno and it was an early shift. Real early. 4:35am early. But the schedule was a good one since I had done it last week and me, the idiot that I am, just assumed that it would be smooth as it was then.
WRONG….WRONG. (Charlie Murphy voice)
So I was heading back outbound and I got to 2nd and Market and seen this old man with a suitcase and a bag making motions to let me know he wanted to get on the bus. Ok. In my mind I’m already thinking maybe this guy wants to go to the hospital (based on his behaviors and how I’m reading him) so I open the door and load up him and this other guy. He gets on and b-lines to the seat behind me and doesnt say anything. The other guy behind him asks me the time and shows me a transfer and walks and I yell “hey dude u got something?” Guy who jumped on second thought I was talking to him so I told that I was talking about the other guy.
That’s when he responded “I got a ticket.”
Me-”if you got a ticket it, show it then”
Him-”I got a ticket”
Me-” if you got it them come up and show or pay or get off the bus”
Then he didn’t say anything after any of my statements i said:
“alright dude you wasting everyones time. You gonna have to get off”
“we ain’t going anywhere until you pay or get off so it’s to your best interest to pick one.”
“alright. If you ain’t gonna get off voluntary, I’m gonna have to make the call and you gonna get off involuntarily.”
I look over and I see a police truck pull up next to me and I wave at him( since I have been sitting at the stop with him behind me for like 3 minutes) and he waves and turns left. Hahaha wow talk about some shitty luck.
So now like 5 minutes have passed and I call central. So central calls me back:
Me-”good morning central. This is run 2 on the 9. I got a fare evader on my bus who doesn’t want to pay or get off after I asked him. Can you send me a TS?”
Cc-”can I get your location and ID?”
Me-”2nd and Market.” I tell him my id.
Cc-”can you give us a description of the person?”
Me-”he’s an African American man wearing a blue hat “
Cc-”anything more to help us?”
Me-”he’s got 2 bags with him”
Cc-”ok. We will send the police to you at 2nd and market”
Me-”copy”
So the dude starts saying something and at this point I’m not gonna talk to dude. I got nothing else to say. One of the other passengers comes up( a Latin lady) and asks in Spanish what’s Goin on and I tell her the situation and that we ain’t gonna be leaving till either he gets off or police comes takes him off. She decides to get off. At the same time i got a big white dude crossing the street and looking at the bus like he wants to get on. As he is about to step on i tell him that i aint gonna be going anywhere because I got someone that don’t wanna pay. He goes “he’s gonna need an escort” and I tell him “their on their way!” and dude smiles. He then says something along the lines of how some people don’t wanna pay and they mess up the rest of the day for others. Probably another 3 minutes go by and the fare evader starts saying some other rants and gets up and starts walking to the door and starts getting off. He talking a gang of shit like ‘ I’ma whip your ass if you get off the bus’,'you muthafuckin punk ass bus driver,’ ‘bitch ass,’ ‘I should come back up there and spit in your face bitch,’ and other shit. So when he starts saying that I respond with “oh yeah, your still getting off the bus though so just keep walking” and once he steps off the bus I 1) call central control back 2) Start loading everyone on the bus ( probably like 5 people outside) and 3) Police show up.
Also, as the dude is walking off the bus the white guy is talkin shit to dude telling him how he wasting his time and then he gets on the bus. Central calls me back and I tell them the guy jumped off the bus and if I can continue in route( I can make up all my time at the end of the line with the recovery time given) and keep going and they say yes.
So the police officer that passed me up jumps on the bus and realizes I was flagging him down the first time and he apologizes and I was like it’s cool and told him that the dude that was over there and that he didn’t wanna pay or get off. He tells me his badge number(just in case I need to file paperwork) and he steps off the bus to talk to the guy who is Trying argue with the officer while another police car pulls up. I take off and I leave them to argue while I try to make up my time on the run.
I drop off the old white guy like 3 blocks later and as he gets off he says “I hope the rest of your day goes better and you don’t gotta have anyone else escorted off” and he laughs.
